INSERT—I cannot believe that 10 years ago I could see the above image as how I truly in my subconscious pictured God. This is my greatest sin. But instead of Jehovah cursing me and destroying me as I so deserved He instead blessed me and taking time and gave me REASONS to change my sinful opinion of Him. One would have to be able to reads hearts to know how sorry I am.
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I have committed many sins and know that I will commit more. But I know that I can be forgiven for all my sins by mean of Jesus Christ. But there is one sin that I am having a problem forgiving myself for. My most destructive sin was that of misjudging God’s (character, nature, quality, temperament, personality, disposition, spirit, moral fiber, makeup). I know that God has forgiven me because for the past twenty-four years he has been SHOWING me who He really is. The one Scripture that changed my thoughts completely about God is found at 2Chronicles 16: 9 “For the eyes of the Lord search back and forth across the whole earth, looking for people whose hearts are perfect toward him, so that he can show his great power in helping them.”
For forty years I worked to keep God from kicking me away from him. It didn’t matter if he did not give me what I wanted all that mattered to me was that he not leave me. I got what I wanted until I was fifteen years old when my grandfather who raised me died. From the time he left me until now I fear that those I loved will leave me. Fear has been the master in my life. What I fear proved to be so in many of my relationships.
I am 66 [73] years old and 40 of those years I spent looking at what others had that they said were blessings from God. I often wondered why God didn’t bless “ME TOO”.
After forty-six years I no longer want what I see others have. I have found and created things that I am completely satisfied with and have absolutely no desire to part with my “quintessence things”. The things that I have, they are exactly what I want; they capture a moment in my soul. My “ME TOO” women originated from one of those moments.
Now that I have truly embraced the Scripture as 2 Chronicles 16: 9, I welcome hope into my life. I trust my heavenly Father implicitly and without reservation! I am no longer like an old strange dog just hoping for a few bones, some water to drink and some place to shelter me because God is blessing “ME TOO”!!! What God does for one He will do for ALL.
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